The Bird Set Me Up!
A woman went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large, beautiful
parrot..
There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00.
"Why so little," she asked the pet store owner.
The owner looked at her and said, "Look, I should tell you
first that this bird used to live in a house of Prostitution
and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff."
The woman thought about this, but decided she had to have the
bird any way.
She took it home and hung the bird's cage up in her living room
and waited for it to say something.
The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said,
"New house, new madam."
The woman was a bit shocked at the implication, but then thought
"that's really not so bad."
When her 2 teenage daughters re |
turned from school the bird saw and said,
"New house, new madam, new girls."
The girls and the woman were a bit offended but then began to
laugh about the situation considering how and where the parrot
had been raised.
Moments later, the woman's husband Keith came home from work.
The bird looked at him and said, "Hi, Keith!"
Hey Hillary
FINALLY, someone has come out with a 100% bipartisan political
bumper sticker. The hottest selling bumper sticker comes
from New York state . .
"RUN HILLARY RUN"
Democrats put it on the rear bumper.
Republicans put it on the front bumper
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Blonde... He did it again?
Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.
He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the
TV.
The 10:00 PM news was coming on. The news crew was covering
a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to
jump.
The blonde looked at Bob and said, "Do you think he'll
jump?"
Bob says, "You know, I bet he'll jump."
The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."
Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the
ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.
The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Bob,
saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your money."
Bob replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier
on the 5 PM news and so I knew he would jump."
The blond replied, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd
do it again."
Bob took the money......
That's it for this issue.
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