Bird Dog & Retriever News
February/ March 2013 Last Laugh
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I have my Limits
Two men go hunting. Bill has never gone hunting while Bob has hunted all his life. When they get to the woods, Bob tells Bill to sit by a tree and not make a sound while Bob checks out a deer stand.
After he gets about a quarter of a mile away, Bob hears a blood-curdling scream. He rushes back to Bill and yells, "I thought I told you to be quiet!"
Bill says, "Hey, I tried. I really did. When those snakes crawled over me, I didn't make a sound. When that bear was breathing down my neck, I didn't make a peep. But when those two squirrels crawled up my pants leg and one of them said, 'Should we take them with us or eat them here?' I couldn't keep quiet any more!"
Mother-In-Laws
An avid hunter went on safari with his wife and mother in law. One evening, while deep in the jungle, the wife woke up and found that her mother was gone. Rushing to her husband's tent, she told the hunter that her mother was missing and insisted on them both trying to find her.
The hunter picked up his rifle and started to look for his mother in law. In a clearing near the camp, they came upon a chilling sight: the mother in law was backed up against a huge boulder, and a large lion stood facing her. The wife cried to the husband, "What are we going to do?"
"Nothing," said the husband. "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."
It's A Perspective Thing
A husband was out fishing until late afternoon...tired and hungry after a long day of fishing, he finally came in to grab supper and left his gear in his canoe.
His wife decided that she wanted to go out on the lake and enjoy the sunset so she went down to the lake and pushed the canoe out.
Not long afterwards a gamewarden came by, and asked if she had her fishing license with her. "I'm not fishing" she replied. The warden answered back, "Well perhaps not, but you have all the equipment. I'm going to have to write you a citation for not having a license."
The wife slightly aggitated but quick on her feet said to him, "Well, alright. But I'm going to have to call the cops and have you arrested for raping me.". "What!!" the game warden replied, "I didn't rape you!". To this the woman replied, "Well perhaps not, but you have all the equipment."
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