Last Laugh, Drink'n & Laugh'n

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Drink'n & Laugh'n

You won't drink away the alcoholism.
A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. So she gets a divorce.
Alcohol is a perfect solvent: It dissolves marriages, families and careers.
What's the difference between men and pigs? Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.
That one liner 'I'm not drinking too much tonight' never goes as planned...
Temples are free to enter but still empty. Pubs charge to enter, but are full. People ignore inner peace & choose to pay for self destruction
A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please, and one for the road."
Math Teacher: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?" Student: "A drinking problem."
A person has to have a warm heart and a cold beer.
All the problems fade before a hangover
An Irishman is not drunk as long as he still has a blade of grass to hang onto.
I had the right to remain silent, but I had lost the ability to.
Alcohol: A liquid good for preserving everything except secrets.
I'm so holy that when I touch wine, it turns into water.
The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off; I shot the happiest 83 of my life.
In good times and bad, in happiness and sorrow, in sickness and health - alcohol is something that has never given up on us.
A smooth, glistening drink in a glass, waiting to make us feel better and forget all our sorrows, alcohol has given us the courage to do things we were probably better off not doing, but had a great time doing them anyway!
Responsible Drinking, now THAT's an Oxymoron
Drinking beer does not make you fat, it makes you lean... against: bars, tables, chairs, people!


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Copyrights Bird Dog & Retriever News May 2018
Do not reproduce or retransmit in any form, and we surf the web, we'll find you.
Maintained by Dennis Guldan e-mail
Bird Dog & Retriever News, PO Box 120089, New Brighton, MN 55112,
Phone 612-868-9169 Adv deadline 1st of the month prior to the issue.